Free February

I have decided that I am going to think about this month as Free February. Which is a bit contrary to my rule-following nature so I’m interested to see how I do. Here are the freedoms I am granting myself this month:1. Free from labels2. Free to explore my relationship with alcohol3. Free to commit to Freestyle4. Free to not track while I am in London with my family5. Free to love and accept myself just as I amAs I wrote yesterday, I am feeling the need to be free of labels right now. I am not ready to label myself as “sober” or “alcohol-free” and that is ok. I need to be free to continue to explore my relationship with alcohol. To take my own authentic journey through this tricky territory.I am also going to stop stressing about whether or not to commit to Freestyle and just give it more time. This weight loss journey is a marathon not a sprint.And since we are taking our kids to London in a couple of weeks, I am also going to spend some this month not tracking. I plan to make good choices - some of the time. I also plan to eat all of my favorite foods without guilt, knowing that I will get back on track as soon as I get home.This month I am going to make an extra effort to love myself just as I am. Even if I drink wine. Even if I eat an entire jar of Nutella while in London. Even if I gain weight.I hereby embrace my flaws. I hereby love that I am a work in progress. I hereby accept that life is a constant recalibration and I love that I have come so far in achieving a healthier overall balance.Five days in to Free February, and on my first February weigh-in day, here’s where I am:

• 0 lb lost
• 1 lb gained
• -19 weeklies
• 4 blue dots
• 5 workouts
• 1 glass of wine

Relieved the gain was just a pound considering the degree to which I allowed Super Bowl Sunday to be an excuse to overindulge. This week I will get back to six blue dots, maintain my workouts, and stay within my weekly points.More on that glass of wine in my next post.