Joy in During
The Blog Formerly Known as Maintaining Mama
For my most recent writing, please visit my Substack, Best Mom Never!
My Frenchie and Me
Breaking ‘Gram
I am a gray area Instagram user. I cannot just take it or leave it. But I am also not so deeply addicted that I am beyond helping myself. That is exactly what I am doing with this summertime break. And it’s going pretty darn well so far.
6 Tips to Thrive (Not Just Survive!) This Holiday Season
What are you really craving?
The difference between experiencing cravings as a gray area drinker versus as a non-drinker is the WHY.
How About No?
The Gray Area of Not Drinking
But what about that space between gray area drinking and… whatever comes after? This is the gray area of not drinking. And, like gray area drinking, it’s an uncomfortable place to be (even without the hangovers!).
4 Steps Out of a “Should” Spiral
How do you “should” yourself? Do you tell yourself you should be moving, eating, parenting, or adulting a certain way? How does it make you feel when you speak to yourself this way?
Pretty lousy, right?
Stay Brave
Stay brave: this is my 2022 mantra. What do these words mean to me today? To move my body and dare to accept her just as she is.
Dry January: A Necessary Glimpse of Technicolor
I was a gray area-drinking wine mom. Here’s what I told people when I committed to dry January 2018: “I just need to detox and lose some holiday weight.”
What I really meant was this: “I am ashamed and embarrassed and terrified. I feel completely out of control and completely alone in my struggle.”
4 Tips to Decrease Doomscrolling and Social Media Use
Did you know that your phone can act as a substitute for booze when you need a dopamine hit? EEK. Opening up a news or social media app lights up the reward center of the brain because our brains are information junkies. But just as with alcohol, excessive phone scrolling, and especially doomscrolling, can throw off the brain’s homeostasis and desensitize us so that we need to do more of it to get the desired “reward” effect.
Are You Suffering from Noverwhelm?
It has taken me a long time and a lot of coaching to figure out what response works best for me when a positive routine gets disrupted. I don’t always follow these steps - sometimes I just reach for the Nutella jar or my phone instead. But I always feel better moving through my angst instead of avoiding it with sugar or scrolling.
What Would You Say to a Younger You?
Taking time to ponder what you’d say to a younger you is an enlightening exercise that deepens self-compassion. There is great value in seeing how far you’ve come; reminding yourself that you have made it through all of your worst days; and gifting yourself a pep talk with the words that are most meaningful to you.
Acute AF Gratitude
At 1,167 days alcohol-free, I often take my sobriety for granted. But then there are moments where the gratitude I feel for my sobriety is acute and profound.
Little Do We Know
Little do we know. This is both comforting and unnerving. Because we can’t know what catastrophes lie ahead. But we also can’t know what joys are in store for us. And there IS joy in store. Even in a burning, drowning, sick world. Because this world is also beautiful, and it’s all we’ve got.